an investment banker bought my myspace account
today an investment banker associated with j.p. morgan posted an essay on my myspace blog
the investment banker, kevin chen, bought my myspace account to 'support the arts,' apparently
kevin 'nets' 160k a year, he seems smart
i'm excited to have diversified my identity into the business sector
seems 'cool'
not sure what else to blog about this
i've cried a lot since the last blog post
salt from my tears has 'caked, heavily' on top of my macbook's keyboard, and, as the crystals reflect the 'fluctuating glow' of the computer screen (going from statcounter to sales rank express to blogger to edensoy's website), it looks sparkly, like a magical land free of shit-talking
'tearing up' again
just stared through tears at the computer screen for ~50 seconds
now every time i open and close my macbook i hear 'crunchy' noises, from the salt 'grinding' against...the 'gears' (?), or something (microchips maybe), inside the keyboard
is this life
when will a shit-talker 'actually' 'kill me' in concrete reality
sales don't seem to be rising at all
is 'rising sales' an urban legend, does it even exist
is the toy poodle to the right what my career looks like to the new yorker, the pulitzer prize, bookforum, the village voice, larry dark's the story prize, the guggenheim committee, the NEA committee, the members of the NBCC, and i guess the washington post
because i feel like that toy poodle
physically comfortable, 'ever-conscious of my alma mater,' facing away from the sunlight (so i can feel it on my backside, maybe), and 'about to fall asleep' though 'it's probably 1 p.m. and i just woke up'
i feel confused
what am i describing
do i want to be sponsored by 'a lesser-known company that manufactures adderall,' 'any farming collective in south america that grows organic coffee beans,' 'advil pm,' 'no-doz,' 'any brand of anti-depressant,' or 'the city in florida named "coconut creek"'
do i want to sleep or do i want to be productive
i have images of a person sleeping, then waking up, and doing things, then going back to sleep, seems normal
just felt confused about the difference between 'narrative arc' and 'career arc'
the investment banker, kevin chen, bought my myspace account to 'support the arts,' apparently
kevin 'nets' 160k a year, he seems smart
i'm excited to have diversified my identity into the business sector
seems 'cool'
not sure what else to blog about this
i've cried a lot since the last blog post
salt from my tears has 'caked, heavily' on top of my macbook's keyboard, and, as the crystals reflect the 'fluctuating glow' of the computer screen (going from statcounter to sales rank express to blogger to edensoy's website), it looks sparkly, like a magical land free of shit-talking
'tearing up' againjust stared through tears at the computer screen for ~50 seconds
now every time i open and close my macbook i hear 'crunchy' noises, from the salt 'grinding' against...the 'gears' (?), or something (microchips maybe), inside the keyboard
is this life
when will a shit-talker 'actually' 'kill me' in concrete reality
sales don't seem to be rising at all
is 'rising sales' an urban legend, does it even exist
is the toy poodle to the right what my career looks like to the new yorker, the pulitzer prize, bookforum, the village voice, larry dark's the story prize, the guggenheim committee, the NEA committee, the members of the NBCC, and i guess the washington post
because i feel like that toy poodle
physically comfortable, 'ever-conscious of my alma mater,' facing away from the sunlight (so i can feel it on my backside, maybe), and 'about to fall asleep' though 'it's probably 1 p.m. and i just woke up'
i feel confused
what am i describing
do i want to be sponsored by 'a lesser-known company that manufactures adderall,' 'any farming collective in south america that grows organic coffee beans,' 'advil pm,' 'no-doz,' 'any brand of anti-depressant,' or 'the city in florida named "coconut creek"'
do i want to sleep or do i want to be productive
i have images of a person sleeping, then waking up, and doing things, then going back to sleep, seems normal
just felt confused about the difference between 'narrative arc' and 'career arc'
37 Comments:
hehe this is my first time legitimately doing this on anything: first.
"as the crystals reflect the 'fluctuating glow' of the computer screen...it looks sparkly, like a magical land free of shit-talking "
ive only been reading your blog since sarah became your intern but this current era seems like a "peak"
you make me want to kill myself or something
what happens now?
@benji i'm glad you are commenting here ben
@anonymous 'damn'
tao lin
this is a pretty good joke
you should have waited a few days before unveiling the new "presence" - now we all know the $8100 bid was a joke and you're still broke son!
haha
narrative arc is inversely proportional to career arc. i think.
So your MySpace page indirectly got bailed out by the federal government in the name of bringing artists and bankers closer together?
Wow, that's messed up -- I really need a margarita.
check out taoism on urban dictionary.
Dont cry.
I am sending positive thoughts at you right...now.
i stopped crying
ate a giant salad
drinking beer on my bed
my face looks either 'really neutral' or probably vaguely 'pissed off' though i feel detached and without anger, or emotion
myspace is the new soup can...
I liked the bit in Kevin's blog about you running to the toilet to avoid other people in your class. Totally did that for three years during my degree.
Rising sales probably won't start to appear until you release a seminal work. So if 'Richard Yates' is your 'Nevermind' then people will start buying everything else by you.
I think Schopenhauer was a big fan of toy poodles.
We're all doomed to write the colonial literature of the 21st century. All waterboarding victims will read twilight.
cool man
its funny that an investment banker bought your myspace and then used that money to make an investment.
feel confused
a theory for you--- maybe the technology you try to speak through has shaped your thoughts. the way your computer gives you information is the way your brain is trying to give you information. all s t a c c a t o, you are the reflection of the milieau.
except its not working. navel-gazing at a robot navel...
maybe find a white tower to write your own book of bokonon?
This comment has been removed by the author.
you make me laugh. thank you.
i just read the previous blog with that one commenter. one time, i was waiting for a train at union square with a friend of mine who is a girl. next to us on the platform, i recognized tao lin. he was wearing a backpack. i whispered to my friend, "that's tao lin." she didn't know who he was. we got on the train and she slipped into the last available seat in the car, but it had looked as if tao had wanted to sit down. after a stop, she got up and crossed to the opposite door from her seat and tapped tao on the forearm and offered her seat. tao seemed a little surprised to be so directly offered the seat, and he graciously took it. at that point, it was unclear whether he took the seat because he really wanted it or because maybe he just didn't want to reject such a direct offer of a seat. tao didn't know we knew he was tao lin. and he just acted like a normal person being offered a seat... he seemed quiet, somewhat introverted and sensitive to subway-seating dynamics. it was fairly late in the evening on a night when most people hang out with other people. and tao was alone.
i haven't really read a lot of tao's work or anything. but, i can say that he is a human being. i mean. i noticed that much. just a person. he doesn't seem malicious, if slightly mischevious. and all this is to say, that even as a joke, no one deserves the type of vitriol and truly mean-spirited comment he got in the last post. it made me sad for that person that he or she felt so vulnerable to tao's public (or private) personality that they would want to make that kind of comment. if they had been hurt by tao personally, i thought it was wrong to air these grievances in a public forum. i feel compelled to speak up on my lunch break. i don't know tao, but i do know mean-spiritedness. that's more nihilistic and more destructive than any brand of irony.
i like astronomicblue
I am inspired by this. Maybe I'm just insipid. Brent Spiner is fascinating, but that has nothing to do with this.
Ants.
hey, hey. chin up. keep your eye on the prize.
...weed and pizza.
also, yes, saw you there, failed to say "hi" because it would have involved some sort of crazy random introduction- which can, at times, be worse than a weep-crunchy macbook.
hey tao i blogged about you http://didyougetthatthing.wordpress.com/?p=112
I think this is a better idea:
http://cgi.ebay.com/become-a-character-in-a-novel_W0QQitemZ170329335490QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item27a86b66c2&_trksid=p3911.c0.m14&_trkparms=72%3A1205%7C66%3A2%7C65%3A12%7C39%3A1%7C240%3A1318%7C301%3A1%7C293%3A1%7C294%3A50
@peter link doesn't work
@nathan good job
@astronomicblue hi
@tao
You have inspired me
tao are you sure? i just pasted it into my browser and it worked.
@peter
I can't get it to work either
sorry sorry here: http://didyougetthatthing.wordpress.com/
TAO! Wow! 8 k for a myspace account - plus the guy seems pretty cool...one of those suppressed artists that followed the Traditional Asian Pathway of Success As Pressured By His Asian Parents.
My brother's the same age as you, but one day older. His name is Tao as well and our last name has 3 letters, just like yours. He works at a well-paying job and majored in computer science. I have no idea what I'm going to do in college.
To Tao (as if this was to anyone else) - keep it real for the Asians. I think I'll pick up one of your novels because I feel ya boy.
you're not going to win the pullitzer prize.
@connie another tao, nice
@anonymous i know
i feel totally detached too. maybe we can high five (or try to) while floating past each other in the void. the arm-momentum would set us spinning like tops and we'd probably smash into the hubble telescope (oops, sorry, i'm sort of mixing the void and outer space, which i realize aren't the same).
i remember reading this and feeling pretty moved.
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