*Mutiple Perspectives* Reading in Kansas *Mutiple Perspectives*

Deb Olin Unferth and I read in Kansas 2/24/08.
After the reading I typed what happened (#4 below).
Then Robert J. Baumann typed what happened.
Then Gabe Holcombe typed what happened.
Then Anne Boyer typed what happened.
Then An Intern typed what happened.
Then Deb Olin Unferth typed what happened (#3 below).
Then Stephen Daniel Lewis typed what happened.
Then Colin Bassett typed what happened.
Then Brandon Scott Gorrell typed what happened.
Then David Ohle typed what happened (#2 below).
Then Clancy Martin typed what happened (#1 below).
Then Chloe Jones typed what happened.

1. CLANCY MARTIN TYPES ABOUT THE READING

Deb's duplex was crowded. I couldn't tell the average age of her grad students, but they seemed happy and interested. I wanted a drink. It did not seem that anyone was drinking excessively. I ate a carrot or some other piece of fruit or vegetable from the vegetable tray and then, I think, a few crackers. Tao was handsome and shy. Deb looked nervous. I walked around her apartment and asked her what she was reading. We talked for a minute about TROUTFISHING IN AMERICA, and then about some other book. I was thinking about Paul and Jane Bowles, like I always seem to when I am around Deb, I don't know why exactly, I suppose because she has spent all of this time in Central America, and her writing reminds me of Bowles, and I asked her if she had ever read that essay about PB by Gore Vidal. Then we both felt our conversation was becoming silly, too much about books, so we hurried away and joined the others and tried to get Tao to talk about his work, which he wouldn't, naturally. Then we all drove over to India Palace. There I was the one who tried to make poor Tao sit in the middle so he could be fed to the Christians but he wouldn't. I ordered a vegetarian dish because I had gathered somehow that Tao was a vegetarian and so I thought we should maximize vegetarian dishes. Yes, we all talked about pneumonia, because Deb has pneumonia, though she is recovering, and as we talked it turns out that many writers have had pneumonia, perhaps because of Thomas Mann and Kafka, or perhaps because we don't exercise enough. I didn't find out if Tao had once had pneumonia. He looks very healthy but one could imagine him tubercular, especially if he were German. Whenever possible I turned the conversation to the always delightful subject of ME. The food was excellent, especially, I think, the okra. Tao was quiet and not easily drawn out. I thought about the reading, I was eager to see Tao and Deb together, and eager to hear Deb's students laughing at her story. It is nice to see how they look at her. I thought about a recent reading by Diane Williams in Kansas City, the drama of her reading, and how confused my own students were by her work. I thought it was puzzling and painful that neither Tao nor Deb wanted a drink before reading. How do people do it, I wondered. I looked at them both to try and see inside them, to see if they were taking any secret medications. Then we walked to the reading and I bid $50 on a Tao t-shirt, which I hope I won though I still haven't heard, and if I did and somebody who knows that I won reads this please contact me so I can pay for my shirt and own and wear it. I don't know if t-shirts are common at readings because this was only the fourth reading I have been to but it seemed like an excellent idea and also somehow very Tao Lin, though I don't know if he had anything to do with it. I wanted to buy a couple of Tao's books while I had the chance and have him sign them and ideally draw a picture in them for me. Then, unexpectedly, I had to leave.

2. DAVID OHLE TYPES ABOUT THE READING

How come nobody invited me to the bar? I had to go home like a stinker and sulk. Just kidding. There were no bar intentions when I left. Just plans to go eat leftovers broccoli and salsa (gag). Is Motorman a harder word to remember, I wonder, than Bed, or 3rd Bed? I was always afraid of two things -- wearing a Halloween costume and blogging. Now I'm afraid of Tao Lin/Deb Unferth readings. I had to sit on the floor it was so crowded. A young person kindly offered me his chair. I said no thanks, He said, "But I'm young." BFD, I thought. I used to be, too. My legs did stiffen a bit sitting like that. When it was all over I went back for some cheese and wine. There was wine, but I didn't see any cheese. I was in the mood for some emmenthaler on a cracker, maybe some hummus and Bible bread. Well, the reading was free and entertaining and the wine wasn't bad, a bit too red and thick for my taste, but free is a small price to pay. And luckily I knew who Dakota Fanning (or is it Fanny?) and Haley (James?) Osmond were or I couldn't have followed Tao Lin's story at all. He's quite a fast reader and I'm a slow thinker.

3. DEB OLIN UNFERTH TYPES ABOUT THE READING

Here's one event: Tao was hungry after the reading and came into my house for leftovers. He said he'd take some food to go. He swept a plate of small broccoli pieces into his arm. Then he wanted to take the salsa. I poured some into a plastic container for him. He said he didn't want chips. He said he would just eat the salsa. I insisted he take chips and he put them on top of the salsa. I'm not sure where the broccoli was at that point. Then he took a piece of carrot cake and put it into the salsa. Then he left.

Something Tao said: I would live here. He was referring to Kansas, I think. Unless he was referring to my house, which is where he was when he said it. Or he may have been referring to the green chair in the corner that he was sitting in when he said it, as in: This chair, I would live on it.

My overall evaluation of the event: the best part was the people.

4. TAO LIN TYPES ABOUT THE READING

I got off the plane and Robert met me and his friend Gabe and we got in Robert's car. Gabe said something about "Deez Nuts" jokes and said something about something and it was funny and then later said something else on the same topic and it was funny again. There was a trailer thing with an expanded thing and it looked like a thing someone lived in and some funny things were said. We drove in the wrong direction. Robert had some books in his bag and I looked at them and I looked at an entire book and didn't like it. I liked another book but I didn't like it that much. In the car I texted Ellen Frances who was going to come with me but had a work meeting and I sent her photos and we talked about her mom who was coming to my reading. We talked about the Get Up Kids who are from Lawrence. Later I talked about the Get Up Kids to Robert and Gabe. Robert at one point said, "The Hold Steady," and laughed in a way I thought was funny. We walked on Massachusetts street. An obese man who looked like Santa Claus was very angry at a car that drove on the street and he yelled something. I said the town should play the Get Up Kids on giant speakers in the city. Gabe said I should bring that up at the next city council meeting. I said I would. We drove to a house and there was a lot of vegan food and graduate students. Deb Olin Unferth showed me her house. It was a two-story house. I saw a lot of books and said, "How did you get all those books here?" There was some confusion. We walked into the main party area. Deb's first novel is forthcoming from McSweeney's. There was a vegan carrot cake and vegan pumpkin cake things and other vegan cake things on the table. We had gone to a juice place and I had had 24 ounces of beet, carrot, celery, and cucumber juice and I felt healthy and I did not want to eat any cake but eventually I ate almost half the carrot cake, a few pieces of the squash vegan thing, some crackers. More people came and brought more food. I ate a lot of grapes. Clancy Martin and Deb talked about the next issue of NOON and I wanted to read it and they talked about one story that was in an old NOON and Clancy said something about three levels of irony and I remembered reading in his introduction of his translation of "Thus Spake..." by Nietzsche that he had said something about Nietzsche being really sarcastic or something. Clancy's first novel is forthcoming from FSG. When Clancy sat by me he said, "The famous Tao Lin." Later we learned that Clancy was soon going to be the most famous person any of us knew probably and we felt excited about this. We sat and talked and stood and talked and we went to an Indian restaurant and I ate more food and ate some other people's food. People did not finish their food. We listened to Clancy Martin talk about a story about pneumonia because someone had pneumonia and then Anne Boyer said a pneumonia story. Both pneumonia stories sounded like made-up stories but I knew they were true. They tried to get me to sit nearer the middle of the table but I sat on the end. I made "garnish" for my water glass and Deb said she wanted one also and I made one for her. Anne said her publication process for her poetry book was easy because they just called her and asked her if she had a book. Anne's pneumonia story ended with "I saw a hedgehog" or something and confused me momentarily. After we ate a lot of food and everyone seemed to be very full and talked about vomiting we went to the gallery the reading was at and saw the people. There were many people. I read. Deb read first then I read. Then there was wine and donations and they gave me and Deb the donations. Deb refused and they gave me the donations. They also made "gay for tao lin" shirts that were I think the term is "silk-screened." They talked about "obese" shirts that they made but did not bring. Robert said, "where are the obese shirts?" I said something stupid and felt stupid a few times. They auctioned the T-shirts. Clancy Martin bid $50 on one before the reading. He had to leave unexpectedly. I had wanted him to hear my story. I had only read his stories in NOON before and always thought he was like Raymond Carver somehow but not really but that I really liked his stories and didn't know anything about him. An Actual Kansas had an intern and at one point he said, "I know what you do to your interns." I liked the intern. During the Indian dinner I was doing strange things that might be alienating to some people with my table mat. But then Deb started doing it also and I felt comfortable. For some reason I made a really happy facial expression at one point after the reading or before the reading next to the intern and Anne took my photo. I walked very quickly to her camera to look at the photo. I talked to people and it was fun and I felt welcome and kept thinking "best reading series ever." Anne Boyer and Robert J. Baumann kept giving me things and making me feel ashamed for being treated so well. I talked to one of Deb's students and he said he read Chris Ware in the class. I said if he read Jimmy Corrigan. He said no. We each said some more things and created some confusion between us that was not resolved. Then I tried to pick up a chair because I saw Robert picking up like 50 chairs to move into the back and Robert stopped me and told me to keep talking to whoever I was talking to and not work at all I think. I felt that he was very nice. I thought about this. I tried to plan into the future how to "repay" them. I talked to my friend's mother. She said she understood my story or something like that. I talked to someone else I knew from the internet. I talked to someone else. David Ohle was there and I said I liked his first book but I couldn't remember the title and no one helped me with the title. It was "Motorman." To prove somehow to him that I really had read it I said that 3rd Bed published it. We went to a bar. I talked to Deb and Elliott and someone else. Someone else said, "You like Leftover Crack? My brother likes Leftover Crack." At one point I said, "Do you like that person more, Bolano, or Pessoa?" Elliott said something about reading on this blog that I typed something where I said I wouldn't think at all and that it made him feel very sad for some reason. I didn't understand at first but later on I thought about it and I think it is sad how it is different when I type really fast. But I don't know, it is a different kind of sad. He was talking about this I think which is similar to this post. They began talking about John Cheever. I wanted to read John Cheever. Someone said Cheever was very sad and I thought about what I remembered from him and I thought, "Oh yeah, he is sad." I talked about Richard Yates. I think I tried to say that Richard Yates was even sadder than John Cheever though I feel confused about saying that now because I don't know much about John Cheever. The bar reminded me of a bar in Chicago or maybe some other place where everyone went after some reading. I thought about outside the bar and I liked Lawrence. Robert drove me to his place. He had a lot of chapbooks. He had a lot of books on existentialism. I stayed on his sofa and burned a CD off Robert's computer and we woke up at 5 a.m. Robert asked me if I wanted anything to eat. He had grapes. I said grapes. We went to the airport. In the car Robert said a story about how he and some friends played Rage Against the Machine on his college campus and got naked and was chased away. At the airport someone looked like a famous writer and I wasn't sure but then I was sure it wasn't him and I slept on the plane.